Not Just Your Garden-Variety Neurotic Smartass.

The Bionic Woman Strikes Again.

I went to see my orthopedic surgeon yesterday to talk about my mess of a shoulder, and he wanted to schedule surgery immediately, but I convinced him to postpone it until after the holidays. Who wants to be laid up during the holidays? Not this chick.

So, in January I will be having rotator cuff surgery for the second time; and this time he’s going to have to do a tissue graft. Ouch! Sounds very involved, and it also sounds like I am going to be undergoing physical therapy forever.

I will be grateful to have all of this over with, and very grateful to be able to raise my arm again and do things like put on a shirt without crazy contortions and extreme pain. Damned shoulder.

In other news, mama and babies are doing very very well. The kittens are teeny little mewing precious angels who have entirely taken over my heart, and Nancy Drew the cat has calmed down entirely and loves to be petted. I am so happy to have them.

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Four kittens!! I have tried and tried to turn this photo, but it’s not happening. Apologies.

Going Riding On the Highway.

It’s 11 degrees today. Eleven! It’s still mid-November and I am not ready for this crap. I have short hair and my red, frozen ears are protesting.

Life continues to be a rather insane roller coaster. Do you remember that popular song from years back that went, “Life is a highway, I’m gonna ride it all night long.”? Well, my life is a highway, but it just so happens to be full of potholes and I am driving (for the first time in twenty years) a car with four flat tires that is leaking oil and antifreeze.

Let’s get the crappy news out of the way first, shall we? My Facebook was hacked, which I initially thought was no big deal, because all someone did was post some goofy weight loss ad and tag some of my friends. Then I did some digging and found that three people were logging in as me, two of them local. My Facebook is scheduled for deletion, which apparently takes a month.

Then, possibly as a result of this, someone hacked my debit card and cleaned out my bank account. I don’t know if you can imagine the stream of swear words that came flying out of my mouth, but I assure you it was colorful and imaginative.

That’s the bad news. Now for some good news: I got in contact with the local animal rescue team recently and let them know I was interested in fostering any cats they might have, and on Saturday I became the proud foster parent to one Miss Nancy Drew, an extremely pregnant cat who is very afraid and slightly ornery (as most pregnant creatures are).

Nancy was either an outside cat or was dumped outside by a previous owner (people can be rotten), so she spends most of her time in hiding, but she has allowed Jasmine and I to pet her, so she’s coming around.

To say I am looking forward to kittens would be a huge understatement, because tiny floofs would do my heart good right about now. The challenge is going to lie in not keeping one (or more) because I really, really do not need another vet bill. Still, kittens! BABIES! So cute.

It feels good to be excited about something, so I will hold onto that, and I will leave you with that too.

Update From Insanoland.

Well, hi there, lovelies. I’d like to say that I haven’t updated recently because life has been running as smoothly as a brand-new Mercedes and that I’ve been having a jolly old time, but things have been pretty crazy in this neck of the woods.

First of all, I’m actually supposed to be in court today because my dentist is suing me for non-payment. The line forms on the left, asshole. I owe something like a small fortune in medical bills. Thankfully, my bankruptcy lawyer has gotten a continuance; and by the time the case is continued, my bankruptcy will have been filed.

It’s so much fun being grossly in debt and not working that I can’t even begin to describe it.

Then, my daughter started having pain in her mouth, so she went to the dentist (same dentist). She needs a root canal. Big bucks there. So, I am throwing down 110 bucks for that; and my dad is loaning me the rest. I have to pay him back every month, which is a pretty stiff bill that I cannot afford.

Then we took Jasmine’s car in for a free vehicle inspection. What we learned was that the gasket cover that holds the coolant is cracked. That’s a job that requires 7 1/2 hours of labor and costs 915 dollars. We also learned that the car is leaking oil from multiple locations and needs two new rear tires. Fabulous.

I had the car towed back to our house, since there was really no chance of getting it fixed

I have three broken teeth and need a couple of root canals as well; but even with the new dental insurance I just got and am paying a hearty fifty bucks a month for, I can’t afford the deductibles for major repairs.

So, there’s all that, and I’ve been having some pretty bad stomach pain for about a month. Friday I started throwing up what looked like black coffee grounds. Saturday night it got worse.

Yesterday morning I called my GP and she flipped out on me, saying that the coffee grounds were a sign of internal bleeding and that I had to go to the ER right away. Somewhat panicky, I went. I was so panicky, as well as dizzy and tired, that I had a seizure in triage.

After I finally came to a while later, they hooked me up to some monitors, took a ton of blood, took urine, and did a rectal exam (oh boy).

After all this joy and happiness, it was determined that I had a bad stomach flu and a possible GI bleed. (Wouldn’t you think they’d have done an upper GI there?!) I was referred to a gastroenterologist and given two huge shots, one in each arm, for nausea. I was also sent home with five new meds, like I’m not on enough damn meds already.

Therefore life has been truly lovely of late, but I’m hanging in there, and I’m lucky enough to have good friends who care and check in with me and are there to listen to my woes. It helps.

Hopefully you’re having righteously good times and money problems are not on tap for you. Be well.